Monthly Archives: May 2015

Cupcake Rage, and a Low Carb Beni, with a Fancy Bacon Lattice for two

This weekend I went to the Ginkgo petrified prison… I mean forest. Its what appears to be around 22 logs, set in holes all over  Wanapum recreational area. They are firmly secured under grates so that the hippies don’t steal them to make their tea. The rest is just interesting kinds of animal scat, and the rolling hills of Washington’s lovely desert. And this one (literally one) really cool wild flower…

DSC_0013 (Note: not a single F**K was given about the prison logs. Nothing is pretty about log jail.)

Its been a slow two months, don’t get me wrong, I’ve been cooking, but blogging took a back burner to living life and having a good time. That and I’ve been on a diet. While its wonderful to make all of the tasty treats that my little brain dreams up, sometimes I need to slow my roll. So here’s some diet food. If you still want your bread, might I suggest going the biscuit route… a big fluffy biscuit… with loads of butter, and tiny bits of finely minced garlic and onions spread all throughout it…  Ps. Thats the kind of torture this has been for me. If you walk by me with a cupcake right now I will knock you out, with what I call my fists of hanger, and step on your throat while I slowly eat the whole thing.. Smooch.

6 pieces of bacon cut in half

6 eggs

2 cups arugula

1/4 cup hot melted butter

juice of half a lemon



cayenne pepper

Preheat your oven to 400 degrees. Arrange your bacon in two tightly woven lattices. Bake for 25 minutes, then switch to broil for 5 minutes to get the top extra crispy.


Poach four eggs, (bring the water to a light simmer, pop them in for 3-4 minutes and spoon them out once they have solidified to your liking.

Take the two remaining eggs, and whisk them with a little salt and lemon juice until they thicken. I like to pretend I’m making a mayo. That way my hollandaise doesn’t separate.  Take the hot butter, and slowly pour it in, while whisking the eggs with all your might. Once your mixture has thickened add in some cayenne and a little pepper. You can use a blender for this too, but I broke mine. So do it the hard way. Like me. All the time.

Arugula does something very tasty to hollandaise and eggs benedict. This isn’t just a pretty green garnish. Toss the arugula on a plate, gently set your bacon lattice over the top, followed by the poached eggs, and heavy smattering of hollandaise sauce.


This was good enough to curb the cupcake rage. Remember kids, if you give up your cupcakes, you can have tasty tasty butter…

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